How Can I Explain Myself?
I have one HELL OF A TALENTED friend!!
(original poem)
We’re on repeat, perpetual loop
A song that keeps playing over again
I love the lyrics and I love this dance,
but I want it to be live instead.
We’ve been an idea, an almost,
and it’s like I’m stuck in a web.
Whether disappointed or in heartache,
I keep letting you back in.
How can I explain myself?
Some days I feel walked all over,
Some days I declare that I’m through,
I’ve cried full faces of makeup off,
and I don’t expect like I used to.
But I hope, I always do,
which leads me back to you.
You, my favorite drunk,
my favorite call at one or two.
When you’re upset or lonely
Or want a voice to walk the city with you,
You call me to.
You know you do.
And it’s you I hold onto,
songs and laughs and nights in bed,
strong arms where I fit perfect,
blue eyes and words that resound in my head
again and again.
You’re my best friend.
And you know me, too.
Your voice that jumps my nerves,
splits my stomach right in two.
I read your name on my phone screen,
it’s like you knew I was writing about you.
We do this every time, slip back into
the “Me and You” —
our “dance around,”
our “always something,”
The guy I compare everyone to.
You, my biggest weakness,
You’re the knot I can’t undo.
I tell my friends that I’m not waiting,
but I am.
You know that, too.
